In Harry Potter they speak about how Harry looks like his father but has his mother’s eyes. I remember when my children were born, just about every relative or friend commented on each feature. “She has your eyes, or He has his grandfather’s nose.” I kept wanting to say no, those are her eyes and that is his nose. I know of course that children do resemble their relatives, but when you are constantly tell them they are just like someone else, how can they become who they are? 

Putting pressure on the child to be like a beloved relative/friend/celebrity, or telling them they act like a villain of the family, manipulates their self image.

For example my grandfather was a hero to our whole family. He was beloved and treasured in the community, as well as just a wonderful person to be around. So it goes to figure that out of respect someone in the family would name their child after him. So his first grandson was named Ansel, then he named his son Ansel. Then the second grandson named his son Ansel as well. So currently I have a brother and two nephews with the same name. All of them hoping to live up to the original Ansel. It really hurt my first nephew when his cousin was given his name. But since then we have sorta made a joke out of it, by calling my grandfather, Ansel Classic, and the last Ansel,  Ansel 2.0. (Although how is 2.0 going to feel when he gets older, I hope he goes by Andy!) And I have begged my children to discontinue the name in the future. We have way to many Ansels. Sharing a name is often a tradition and it can in-steel pride but there are some consequences that comes with it as well. 

Each individual is different, they have some similarities, but I think we should teach our children to treasure who they are, not force them into a mold. I personally believe that children should strive to not be a copy of another person, but rather learn their own strengths and weaknesses. But it can be argued that by giving the child someone to look up to you set certain standards and give the child pride.

From my own experience I say a child should be praised for their own beauty inside and out, and given a name as a blessing that is truly theirs. Having guidelines from people you look up to is not bad, but heroes should be the ones that you relate to. We shouldn’t self impose who we want our children to be, but rather love who they are. 

Harry Potter proved to be his own person, just with pretty green eyes.